Burned Bridges
by scottishfae
Summary: Sometimes you have to experience loss to know what you've had. This is story three in my Naruto x Shikamaru one-shot series. This story is a BL story with some coarse language and mentions of homosexual relationships. If either of those bug you, please do not read.


_**Burned Bridges**_ || _scottishfae_

**NARUTO** || I do not own Naruto nor do I make any money from this work of fiction.

**PG-13** || Romance, Slight angst

**WARNINGS **|| _**This is a BL story**_. Includes coarse language and mentions of homosexual relationships. Please **do not **read if you don't like such things.

**PAIRINGS **|| Naruto x Shikamaru

**SUMMARY **|| Sometimes you have to experience loss to know what you've had.

**NOTES** || _This story starts off my fanfiction dump day a.k.a. my birthday. Since I don't really have people who want to spend time with me on a regular day, much less on the meaningless day of my birth, I'm going to try and forget this day by writing. Requests are welcome. I hope you enjoy my labours as I try to forget how much of a loser I really am._

This story is connected with my on-going ShikaNaru one-shot series. Previous stories include: _Boom and Bust_ and _A Bit of Random Information_. There will be at least one or two more stories in this series, with the next one containing smut. Look out for those in April or May. Thank you.

* * *

"So the big guy - the one with all the swords - tries to attack me next, okay? He had all those swords going and all you could see was the lights on the blades."

"A-and what did you do?"

Naruto smiled big, playing up to Hinata - the only one of the group actually paying close attention to his story. "I so totally pawned his ass."

Sakura's brows shot up and she looked over to her former teammate. "What does that even mean?"

"Oh - um, it's like-"

"You should know better than to ask the idiot that. He doesn't know - he just heard some kids say it on a mission and thought it sounded cool."

Naruto's face slumped as the group laughed at him. He knew better than to try and argue, so he settled for a sour look and a sip of his drink. Naruto's pout faded, however, as the door opened, revealing his boyfriend.

Shikamaru looked over the crowd that had gathered in his - _their - _apartment. He had just returned from a very long, and very useless, diplomatic mission; and all he wanted to do was sleep in peace and quiet. To say he was annoyed to find his apartment occupied by his friends and colleagues was definitely an understatement. His eyes landed on the only person who could be responsible - the bouncing blond whose energy was always too much for the lazy genius.

"Welcome home Shikamaru," Ino chirped.

She exited the kitchen with bowls of food in her hand. Neji and Tenten followed a second later with even more food. The entire group echoed the greeting. Naruto shot up, deciding to ignore the group, and enveloped him into a hug. "I'm glad you're back," the blond chirped in his ear.

The lazy nin didn't bother to respond to the hug, pushing the other away so he could disentangle himself. He looked at the crowd. It consisted of all of the former Rookie nine, Gai's former team, and a few others that the group had picked up on the way. He noticed that Naruto's constant shadow, Konohamaru, wasn't present. That was something he could be grateful for. With the onslaught of puberty it seemed Konohamaru's idol worship changed from being brotherly to something entirely different. Since then he had dropped challenging Naruto all the time and now challenged him.

"Everyone decided to come over and welcome you home," Naruto explained, trying to drag his lover over to the table where they all were sitting.

Shikamaru pulled his hand out of the blond's. He turned around and made for the bedroom, leaving a very confused group behind. Everyone watched him curiously, looking over at Naruto with equally inquisitive glances.

"Um, Naruto? Is something the matter?" Sakura asked.

He shrugged turning around to look at everyone. "He's probably just grouchy from being away for so long. I'll go talk to him, once he hears there is warm sake out here, he'll be happy to come spend time with everyone."

Ino chewed on her lip and looked at her pink haired friend. "Maybe we should have delayed a welcome home party until he had time to rest."

"This was the only time we were all available," Chouji commented.

He was already partaking in said sake, his back resting against the wall. Several empty bottles lay next to him. "Don't worry about it," Naruto said. "I'll be right back."

Making his way to the bedroom, he slid into the room silently. The room was dark except for the sliver of light coming from beneath the bathroom door. Naruto immediately made for the adjoining room. He knocked once before entering. As he has expected, Shikamaru was already in the shower.

"Oi," Naruto shouted as he jumped up on the counter. "What's wrong with you?"

A grunt was his answer - something not entirely uncommon when the lazy nin was in a bad mood. "You know they all came here to welcome you home, you could at least show you appreciate them for - "

"I don't really give a shit Naruto."

The blond paused. His mouth hung open and he stared at their blue shower curtain. It was rare for Shikamaru to swear and even rarer for him to say it in such a gruff tone. "D-did something go wrong on your mission?"

There was no answer. Naruto began to panic. He stood from his seat and walked over to the shower. Pulling back the curtain some, he peered in at his boyfriend. Shikamaru gave him an annoyed glare before ignoring him to continue washing himself. To the blond's eyes, there were no injuries to take note of or anything visible that could make the other man so perturbed. He noted that his eyes seemed a bit exhausted and his body a bit leaner. "If it makes you feel better, I can ask everyone to be quiet - or even leave for a while - so you can get some sleep. And then they can all come back later."

Shikamaru shut off the tap and pushed the shower curtain completely opened. Naruto handed him a towel. "I'm going home," he said."

The blond cocked his head to the side. "But you are home."

"No, I mean to my parents' house. You can have your party all you want."

Naruto's eyes widened. "D-don't do that! I can ask everyone to leave, they'll understand. Then you can have some quiet - "

"Will you be leaving with them?"

Not quite understanding, Naruto shook his head slowly. Shikamaru avoided looking at him as he dried off. "Then it won't be quiet. I'm going home. I'll be back when I can tolerate you again."

The harsh words, so uncharacteristic for Shikamaru, hit Naruto like a well-aimed punch. His blue eyes hardened; blocking out his emotions with well-practiced ease. He opened his mouth to say something – anything - but Shikamaru ignored him and left the room. Naruto scrambled for the bedroom after him. The lazy genius was throwing on clothes. His pack was sitting on the bed. "How long - "

"Till I'm ready."

He picked up his pack, not bothering to look at the blond, and left the room. The voices in the other room went quiet as they watched the guest of honor leave his own home. Silence reigned, eyes all turned to the bedroom waiting for the blond to come out and explain.

Naruto took a deep breath and walked out into the living room. His plastered smile lit up his face, though his eyes remained dull. "Sorry about that. He's really tired and felt bad about breaking up the party, so he's going to go to his parents to rest."

Doubtful looks were shared by several of the guests, but they kept them to themselves. Instead, the women present coaxed the blond next to them to get his mind off of things.

* * *

Walking down the apartment stairs, the already aggravated Shikamaru groaned when he saw the awkward figure of the teenaged Konohamaru running up the street. The younger man stopped, his hand pointed out and ready to challenge him - as always.

"Don't even bother brat," he said. "You want Naruto? He's all yours. Go enjoy."

Konohamaru looked wide eyed as the older man walked down the street. His back was stiff and his pace a bit too quick - at least from his normal gait. Turning, the younger man rushed up the stairs, taking them two at a time, and walked into the apartment of his crush.

"Hey Naruto?" he called.

The blond turned to smile, he was sitting next to Sakura. "Hey Konohamaru, glad you could make it. Looks like it's just going to be a friendly gathering now."

"Did you and Shikamaru break up?"

The room went quiet again , including Naruto whose grin faded and his shoulders slumped. "No," he said quietly.

"Stupid," Sakura called. "Why would you even ask such a thing?"

"He was just leaving - "

"He's tired and wanted to sleep. He's just going to his parents," Ino defended.

"But," Konohamaru mumbled. "He told me that I could have Naruto."

The blond shot up, surprise evident on his face, and all the hurt hidden under his masks beginning to seep through. He stood up, looking around before retreating into his bedroom. Konohamaru stood wide-eyed looking at his friend's back. He mumbled an apology, but it fell on deaf ears.

"Ino," Sakura said.

The girl nodded. Both stood. Sakura followed Naruto into the bedroom, determined to help out her friend. For her part, Ino announced she was going to go talk some sense into her former teammate.

"Don't bother," Chouji said.

"Excuse me?" Ino said, her hands on her hips. "You're just going to let him get away with this?"

"No. But he's exhausted and annoyed and talking to him now would be fruitless. Let him sleep some and cool off; then he'll realize what a dick he was."

"But Naruto is hurting now."

"And he'll only hurt more if you go and drag Shikamaru back here. Those two have been dating for a while now, and living together long enough; I don't doubt Naruto knows the moods Shikamaru can get into. Everything will be fine."

"And if they aren't?"

"Well then Shikamaru is an idiot and Naruto can move onto better things."

The room went quiet, until Konohamaru spoke up. "He doesn't want better things," he mumbled. "He just wants Shikamaru."

* * *

A soft knock preceded the opening of the bedroom door. Naruto knew the only person it could be – Sakura - and she wasn't going to go away even if he voiced his thoughts. She was as stubborn as he was and when she was bent and determined to poke her nose into other people's business, then by all the deities, she would. That's why Naruto loved her. She was a treasured friend and he was grateful for her.

"Naruto? Are you okay?"

The blond ninja snorted into his pillow. He had laid down on his bed and grabbed the quilt at the bottom of his bed. It was now covering his whole person, with only a few stray locks peeking from beneath the heavy fabric. "Okay, gotcha," she replied. "Not an intelligent question."

She stood just inside the doorway, enough for the door to be closed but not enough to feel like she was barging in without his permission. She knew him well. He shifted underneath the blanket before one side was partially lifted up. Sakura hesitated for only a moment before walking over to the bed and crawling under the covers. She too was engulfed by the quilt.

"This thing smells horrible," she commented, trying to keep it away from her face. Again Naruto snorted. "Where did you get it?"

The blond shrugged. "It was a toss out. There were only a couple of stains and holes in it. Weren't hard to fix - well, the stains are still there." He pointed down to the foot of the bed. Sakura scrunched her nose.

Her experience as a medic ninja knew too well what those stains were. "Why didn't you just buy a new blanket? You make enough."

Naruto was quiet here, shifting slightly. They lay on each of their sides, facing each other, with plenty of room between each of them. Enough so they wouldn't touch each other accidentally, but not so much that they couldn't touch if they wanted to. "It looked - homey. Like something your grandma would make for you, ya know? Something cherished. I couldn't stand to think someone could throw it away so easily."

Sakura looked at the stitching of the part right above her. It looked professionally done. She seriously doubted it was a homemade quilt, probably just something picked up at the local bedding store. Nothing unique or special about it - well that was until Naruto made something special of it. He was good at that.

"You're avoiding the issue," she eventually said.

"I know."

"You wanna talk about it?"

Naruto shook his head. "I've never been the best at expressing myself through words."

This time Sakura snorted in humor. "True. But you've also never been the one to mope around when you're upset - that was more Sasuke's forte."

The both snickered quietly to each other. Their former teammate's betrayal still hurt, but they had each other - and their friends - and they were moving beyond it. "So what's really going on with you and Shikamaru?" she spoke softly, breaching the dreaded subject.

"No clue. If there was something wrong, I didn't know about it."

Sakura sighed. It was so very like him to be ignorant of people's feelings. "You know - you could be right though. He could just be tired from his mission and needs some time to cool off," she offered.

Naruto looked at the quilt and reached up to trace the patterns. "Nah. This is something different, I think. He was - angry when it was just the two of us. He never gets angry. Annoyed and pissed off, yeah - but not angry. I guess - I don't know." He sighed, letting his thoughts take him over once again.

"Naruto," she whispered, reaching out to him. She touched her palm to his cheek. It was warm. She felt him smile before she saw it. He turned to face her again. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."

His grin was bright but his eyes were clouded. Through thick and thin, Naruto's strength amazed her. He looked so hurt earlier, but could so easily smile again to ease her worry. It was unhealthy for sure, bottling up emotions like he did.

"Hey!" another voice came from the doorway. "Are you two making out under there?"

The two under the blanket snickered. "Yeah, now go away Konohamaru, you're disturbing us."

"Aw, but I want to be the one who makes out with Naruto!"

His voice jumped when he said his crush's name. There was laughter both in the bedroom and in the living room. The others hadn't left.

"Looks like you're still suppose to be playing host," Sakura said. "You up to it?"

He nodded. "Well since you, Neji, and Lee are leaving tomorrow for a mission, I don't see how I can pass it up!"

The two former teammates threw the blanket off at the same time. Konohamaru had entered the room further and was looking down at the bed with a pout. Naruto laughed some more as he got up out of the bed. He walked over to the younger man and threw his arm around him. "I promise," he started. "If I ever want to make out with Sakura, I'll invite you too."

"Hell yeah," the pink kunoichi cheered. "Hot threesome!"

Konohamaru's face blossomed red as the two teammates walked out of the room. He followed behind them, tripping over the quilt.

* * *

It had been several weeks since he had gotten home and his parents were royally pissed at him. "When are you going home?" his mom said bluntly.

He was lounging in the sun's rays, a flask of sake at his side. The father-son shogi game was left unfinished near his feet. His father had been pulled away for a last minute mission. Shikamaru, for the first time ever, envied his father. He would have loved to escape the wrath of his mom.

"Is that really any way you should be treating your beloved, only son?"

"When the beloved, only son is being a lazy ass and won't go to his own house, then yes."

"Ungrateful parents," he muttered under his breath.

She shot him an angry glare but made for the kitchen.

"I suppose something happened between you and Naruto-kun then?"

He hated having perceptive parents. But then again, it was from them his own intelligence came from. "None of your business," he called back.

"Perhaps," she replied. "But I like Naruto-kun very much and don't want to see him get hurt." She paused and sighed.

He could hear her rattling about in the kitchen, but if she intended to say anything else, she didn't voice it. "Naruto will be fine. He's strong, even if emotionally constipated."

Shikamaru grabbed his sake flask but found it empty. He pouted to himself. If he was at home, Naruto would be there to give him another - teasing him about becoming an old drunk before his time and urging him to go do something with him. It usually ended with them having sex.

"The way I see it," his mother continued. "You're the one who is emotionally constipated. Naruto just channels his feelings into other things. You just run away to your parents house, lay around, and get drunk. You'll get fat that way too."

The lazy genius took a deep breath, choosing not to respond.

She walked into the room with her hands on her hips. "You know, there is a lot more going on in this village than you're aware; and if you're not careful, it's very possible it'll just pass you by," she said.

The young man sat up abruptly, wanting to know why his mom was now sounding like Ino. He turned around but it was still her. "I promised the girls I wouldn't say anything, so I'm not. But honestly," she threw her hands up. "For you to be so content with being lonely and miserable - you really don't deserve Naruto-kun. And you'll be sorry when it's too late."

"Too late for what, mom?" He was getting a headache.

"Too late to get him back."

She turned from him and went back into the kitchen. He stood up and followed her. "Okay mom, what are you hiding? If Sakura and Ino told you not to tell me something then they're scheming. And those two scheming is never a good thing."

His mother glared at him. She held a large chopping knife in her right hand and held a daikon radish on the cutting board with her left. She pointed the knife at him. "All I'm saying is you might want to get out of this house right now."

The sun hit the knife in a menacing gleam and Shikamaru backed off. He looked at his empty sake bottle - now lying on its side - and the shogi game that couldn't be finished and then walked back to his room to change.

* * *

He was surprised, to say the least, to hear the boisterous laughter of his boyfriend coming down the street seemingly as carefree as usual. It was followed by the girlish giggles of Ino and Sakura with a jumbled but jabbing comment from Kiba. Shikamaru sighed. He didn't want to deal with them just yet; first he needed to figure out what exactly they were planning. He moved out of the way and into the shadows of a nearby building. They would know he was there, of course - they were ninjas - but hopefully they wouldn't care enough to call him on it.

And they didn't. Even after Shikamaru gasped. Naruto was being helped down the street by Sakura, Ino at his side carrying some of his personal belongings and Kiba and Akamaru following slowly behind. He was bandaged heavily around his head and torso but he was still smiling and laughing as if he wasn't in any pain whatsoever. And perhaps he wasn't. But then again, he'd never known the blond to show his pain to the world.

"It seems Naruto deals with his emotions with suicidal amounts training," Chouji's voice came from behind him. Shikamaru stepped to the side to let his friend step out of the door and stand next to him. His large frame took up most of the enclosed stoop. The lazy nin looked back at the door and read the sign. He raised an eyebrow at his friend and former teammate.

Chouji shrugged. "I don't want to hear anything from you on how I get laid. You're the one fuckin' a guy," he paused. "Or was fuckin' a guy, I should say."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "I suppose this means you're in on the little plan. Are the bandages real or is it just a ploy to make me feel guilty?"

"I'm in on nothing. And yeah, they're real. Kiba and I had to help the dumbass to the hospital yesterday. He took quite a beating."

"Who was his opponent?"

The bigger man shrugged. "ANBU, don't know who exactly. Hokage-sama signed off on it, so I expect you'll be hearing from her soon too."

Shikamaru sighed. "This is why it sucks to have a lover who is babied and adored by everyone. The smallest of fights blow up in your face and the whole town hates you."

Chouji looked at his friend. "Is that what this is? Just a fight?"

He didn't answer.

"You're an idiot," the other muttered.

"So I'm told. Though I'm often told the opposite too, so I hardly know which to believe."

"Believe this, no one is going to be mad at you - no, wait, let me start this again," Chouji paused. "No one is going to _stay_ mad at you if you decide to break it off with Naruto. But if you're going to do it, then do it right and don't let this bullshit drag out."

"Who said I was going to break up with him?"

This time Chouji didn't answer. Naruto and his entourage were long gone and could only barely be heard in the distance. The larger man took in a deep breath. There was a soft breeze and the smell of sake, cheap perfume, and his coupling wafting past him. Shikamaru tried not to gag. Suddenly Chouji was in his face, his look was fierce, a look he had been completely without in their younger days - the days of their genin team. "You are one hell of a friend, the best I've ever had," he begun. "But your one shitty boyfriend and I really can't help but feel sorry for Naruto."

He turned and walked out into the street. He took a deep breath and let it out and looked both ways. He turned so he was facing Shikamaru once again. "People will be mad at you, and will stay mad at you, if you continue to treat him like shit. He may forgive you but I know the girls won't, and I won't either."

* * *

Naruto stood in his apartment and looked around. He had trained himself into the hospital again. Literally, the second time, as his fight extended from the practice field to the rooftops. From the rooftops, a very clever maneuver and subsequent kick landed him through a 3rd floor window and into a nurses' station. A nurses' changing station. Most of his injuries from that particular day were taken by the pummeling fist of the dozen female nurses who were horrified to find the blond man in their midst.

At least he could be happy that Sakura had been later chewed out by Tsunade for putting him in the hospital again. He wished he had stayed there. Physical pain was so much easier to deal with.

Shikamaru was sitting in the living room, reading a small book that he usually kept in one of his vest pockets. He put it back when the blond man entered, but didn't lift his head.

Naruto looked around the apartment. It was nearly empty - there was no hiding what the lazy ninja had come there for. "So, I guess this is it?" Naruto said, his voice breaking as he tried to put on a cheery front.

He walked in further and looked into the kitchen; he noticed it was still fairly stocked.

"We're two very different people, Naruto," Shikamaru began. "And I think we both knew this would happen."

Naruto shook his head. "No."

Shikamaru closed his eyes. "Please, let me do these cheesy lines and get it over with. I don't know what else to say to you."

Naruto stared down at him. "Are you breaking up with me?"

The other man nodded his head.

"Then you don't have to say anything else, though I appreciate you telling me and not just moving out."

"Naruto, I - "

The blond shook his head. "Nah, it's okay. We'll just go back to being friends."

He plastered on a big smile and brought his right hand to scratch at his head. "No worries."

Shikamaru stood. "I'm sorry."

Naruto's smile faded. "Not as much as I am."

Turning, the dark-haired man left for the door. He paused briefly to take out a key from his pocket and placing it on a small table at the entrance of the house. He held the bit of metal down on the table for a bit before picking up his hand and leaving; shutting the door quietly behind him.

Naruto just stared at the door. He listened carefully as the footsteps faded down the stairs. The silence was interrupted by his stomach growling. Numbly, he walked into the kitchen and searched through the cabinets. Naruto took a deep breath and stood back; nothing seemed quite appetizing at the moment: not even ramen.

He turned once again and walked through the apartment. It seemed weird. Shikamaru was always the quieter of the two, but the small home felt silent without him.

Sighing, the blond walked to the door. He picked up the extra key as he went and used it to the lock the door before pocketing it. In a sedate manner he was rarely known for, he walked down the stairs, his shoulders drooping a bit. He needed to find Sakura.

* * *

Five people sat in a corner booth, quietly talking away in the new little restaurant they had all begun to frequent daily. It mostly served different forms of beverages, but their small food menu was more than delicious and even the noodle-loving blond loved to meet there.

He was all smiles; sipping on a spiced tea blend that made his nose tingle. Sakura was sitting on his left, talking animatedly to Ino - who was sitting next to her. The blonde girl would jump in for a remark every once in awhile, but mainly stayed focused on the other girl's rather ambiguous story. Chouji sat by Ino, his own drink in hand. Naruto had a suspicion the larger man was spiking it too.

To his right was Neji and the rest of his old team. Neji was sitting like Naruto himself - enjoying the blends of different tea and listening to Tenten and Lee talk about their last mission.

Kiba, Shino, and Hinata were supposed to meet with them later.

"So, they've really decided to get together?" Naruto asked quietly to the man on his right.

Neji nodded his head.

"And you're really okay with this? I mean - it is Kiba. And well, Kiba - "

The older man laughed quietly into his tea and then sat it down on his small napkin. "It is a match I believe many have been rooting for," Neji pointed out. "Not to mention one that has been a long time in the making. No one would bat an eye if you and Sakura ended up together."

Naruto gave a face that clearly showed his disbelief.

"Well that would have been before everyone knew your preferences," Neji teased.

Under the table, Naruto's leg was given a little squeeze and the blond man relaxed into his seat even more. It was getting colder outside, as winter set in, and the restaurant was overly warm to make up for the fact. It made the blond want to drift off into a light slumber.

"Hey guys, over here," Lee shouted with a wave of an arm.

Kiba raised a hand to show he had seen, and the four people in the new group approached the table. The dog-lover shot Chouji an angry look as they got closer.

Naruto opened his eyes to greet the others. His breath hitched before guilt hit him. Shikamaru had decided to join them but looked miserable doing so. "I think we need to squish in more," Naruto said. "Or we'll never fit everyone."

His comment broke the heavy silence and the group began to do just that. It didn't take much for Shikamaru to squeeze in by Chouji without the girls moving too much, but the other side was a different problem. Shino chose to grab a chair and add it to the end of the table.

Naruto scooted over towards Sakura as best as he could. He tried not to invade her personal space too much, but he still ended up fairly close to her. Unlike Neji who was practically plastered to his side.

"Nothing like feeling like a sardine to make an afternoon feel lovely," Naruto joked.

The people to his right groaned at him. He smiled down at them in return. "Just for that, I'm going to go to the bathroom."

There were several groans of exasperation as the blond pushed and shoved the people to his right so they would let him out. He made sure to gloat at Kiba as he passed, and headed straight for the bathroom. He noticed his shadow pretty quickly.

"I didn't know you were the stalker type."

"Just making sure you don't skip out on us," Neji replied. "After all, you're the one leaving tomorrow."

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Yeah, for like a week. It's not anything special."

The blond walked over to the counter of sinks and jumped up on a dry spot. He eyed Neji carefully as the man approached.

"Perhaps not for you, but we like to spend time with our friends. Time can often be too short in our line of business."

Naruto's face went blank and he stooped forward a bit. Neji moved to face the mirror, his body flush with Naruto's sitting form. The blond jumped a little at the contact, but relaxed as he watched the other man's profile. They stayed like that for a while, comfortable in each other's presence. They only jumped and separated when the door opened and another patron walked in.

"Shall we rejoin everyone? Otherwise they might think we're doing something in here that we shouldn't," Neji teased.

Naruto jumped up and brushed down his pants. "Doubt that, but yeah, let's go back. Might as well start getting use to…_everything_."

Neji chuckled and motioned for the other man to lead the way. "Naruto?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think I should get bangs?"

"Bangs?"

"Yeah – I was thinking of changing things up a bit."

"Ok, but bangs?"

"Is that a no?"

They were nearly back at the table and the others were already calling to them.

"You know what, go for it," Naruto finally answered. "If it looks bad, they'll be under your hitai'ate most of the time anyway."

Neji nodded his head. Everyone moved around to let the two men back in front of their cups.

"What took so long, Naruto? Drink expired milk again?" Kiba jeered.

Naruto flicked him off with a smile before picking up his now cold tea and taking a swing. He cringed at the taste; hot tea was not meant to be drunk cold.

"Tomorrow, want to go with me?" Neji asked just under the main threads of conversation around the table.

"Go?"

Neji smiled and reached up to tug on Naruto's blond spikes. "To get my hair cut – you could use one yourself."

"Ah, yeah – kind of kept putting that off."

"I noticed. You should start taking care of yourself more."

"I take care of myself fine."

Neji gave him a skeptical look and ordered more tea.

"I do," Naruto mumbled as he sat back against the padded booth.

* * *

Shikamaru's schedule had become fairly regular – for once. He worked in the missions' office alongside Iruka eight to eight Monday through Friday and one late night eight to eight shift every other weekend. Jobs for his skills had all but dried up, but the regular work was much needed. When he wasn't working, he was at his parent's house, which was the reason he needed more pay. His mother's brilliant idea was to make him pay for room and board while he looked for a new place to stay. The idea of moving in to ninja-only bachelor apartments made him queasy.

Every Sunday, however, whether he had been working or not, he made his way to the memorial monument. He brought a fresh pack of Asuma's favorite cigarettes and sat down so his back was against the cold stone. Flowers and other mementos decorated the site, as usual, and Shikamaru was careful not disturb any as he rested. Opening the pack, he reached in his vest for a lighter and pulled it out.

He took a long drag of the cigarette and held it up to the sky. The clouds were moving fast but the sky above was a clear, crystal blue. "I fucked up, Asuma. More than usual."

It had been almost a year and while being around the shared group of friends had become easier; watching as _he_ moved on wasn't. Mostly it seemed Naruto work. The brief, and still awkward, conversations between the two always happened as Naruto checked in or out. And Shikamaru often noticed it was Neji by his side as he did so. The two had definitely gotten closer. While they both denied anything romantic, the rumours still fluctuated heavily otherwise.

Shikamaru closed his eyes, drawing up his legs, and dropping his head between his knees. He needed to think more clearly; to straighten out his thoughts. But everything just came back to the same conclusion. He missed Naruto.

He missed his unwavering friendship, his boundless energy, his positive attitude and, most of all; he missed what the two of them shared.

"I don't know what to do," he mumbled.

"Really?"

Shikamaru jumped and looked over his shoulder. Kakashi was standing there, back to the monument, reading his ever-present orange book. Shikamaru noticed several flasks of sake and two, small cups were sitting on the monument to the older ninja's left. Fresh cut flowers were to his right. The lazy nin raised his brow in question at the high-level jounin.

Kakashi shrugged. "Sake for Jiraiya and my father. Both were always fond of it."

Shikamaru nodded and looked pointedly at the flowers. "For Iruka's family. I never know what to bring in their honour, so I go with something traditional."

"Not reading porn at the memorial might be a nice gesture."

Kakashi shrugged. He pushed off the large rock and moved around to stand in front of the other man. Shikamaru didn't bother moving. He put out the now spent cigarette and pushed the rest of the pack over his shoulder onto the rock's pedestal.

"So what are you going to do about your Naruto problem?"

Shikamaru snorted though it lacked actual amusement. "Nothing to be done. That bridge has been burned."

"Then build a new one."

The lazy nin looked up, surprised at the bluntness of the other man. Kakashi was staring down at him, his hands in his pockets, and all usual playfulness gone. "The problem with your generation is that you haven't felt real loss yet. And I say yet, because you will. It's an unfortunate truth in our lives. You're a smart kid - learn from Asuma's example and make the most of the time you have now. 'Live to love and love to live,' as they say."

"You mean as Iruka says, because he's the only one I've ever heard say that."

Kakashi chuckled. "Perhaps. Though, if you prod him enough, Gai might say something similar – except more," he cocked his head for a moment, trying to figure out what to say, but instead finished with a flourish of his arms.

Both men chuckled for a bit. Kakashi knelt down so that he could look the other man in the eyes better. "Things aren't as broken as you think, even after a year. Naruto holds on to things dearly, even if they're painful, because that's part of who he is. This time, however, I suggest you take the initiative. Show your interest and he'll eventually open up again to you."

"Rumours say that he isn't single anymore," Shikamaru pointed out.

Kakashi shrugged again. "So? If he is isn't, then take it a lesson in humility. And if he is, then maybe you won't be up here every Sunday."

Shikamaru snorted, giving him an amused look.

"I'm old," Kakashi explained. "Perfectly natural for me to be up here every weekend. Plus, Sunday's are for 'house-cleaning' and I always feel that Iruka does it so much better than me."

"Sounds lazy to me."

"Look who's talking," Kakashi responded.

* * *

Naruto was walking through the Monday open market. It was always the busiest day, since they were closed on the weekends, and the streets were fillwed with Konoha residents and shinobi alike. Already Naruto was lugging two bags in each hand filled with fresh vegetables and fruits. He had a couple more stops before heading back home.

The smell of cooking meat caught the blond's attention and he took a few sidesteps to see where it was coming from. A little stall was cooking different cuts of beef and pork and handing out samples. "Would you like to try some?" one of the two women asked.

Naruto gladly took the little, plastic plate and scarfed down the perfectly cooked pork. The ladies informed him that they were advertising for their father – a butcher who had set up shop near the edge of town. Naruto made sure to get the address before taking another sample he was offered.

His shoulder's tensed a little as he felt the new person come up next to him. One of the ladies greeted the new customer and gave him a sample. Naruto chanced a look to his side. "You've lost weight," he said without thinking; he flinched as Shikamaru gave a sad smile.

"Yeah."

There was an awkward silence between the two as people flooded around them to try some of the butcher's stall samples.

"How have you been?" Shikamaru finally asked.

Naruto shrugged. "Ok. You?"

"Yeah, ok."

Naruto turned slightly to notice that Shikamaru was fidgeting with the hem of his vest. He didn't have any bags or any indication he was there to shop. Both men tried several times to say something, but everything seemed to fall flat.

"I've got a few other places to go, I'll catch you around," Naruto eventually conceded.

He took a few steps back and began to turn when Shikamaru stopped him. "I'm not ok, actually."

"What's the matter? Are you ill? Sakura should be home right now, she only lives a block from here, I can get you there fast."

Shikamaru shook his head. "I'm not sick."

He took a deep breath and finally turned to face the man. Sad, brown eyes met blue. "W-would you like to join me for dinner tonight?"

"Shikamaru," Naruto began.

"No, well, if you're dating Neji, then I understand. But, it's just a date and I'd like to see if we could try again – except without me being such an ass in the end. Or, with an end."

The blond stood there looking at the other man for quite a while. Shikamaru had begun to fidget again, but he didn't break eye contact.

"I'm not dating Neji. We've just become good friends. I needed that."

The lazy nin nodded and waited. Naruto closed his eyes and turned his back. "I've got genin babysitting duties later this afternoon, won't be done until after eight."

"My parents are both out on missions. I can pick up something and we can eat it there."

Naruto nodded and gave a little wave as he disappeared into the crowd. He didn't see Shikamaru's bright smile, a rarity in and of itself, nor his two former teachers smiling at each other from the shadows.


End file.
